Just let me swim…

We left the children.

I’m sitting in a hotel, completely free of anyone below drinking age (not that that matters in our case), wondering what to do with myself. Jason and I spent the weekend up on San Juan Island where we honeymooned, and he’s returning me to our children this afternoon. He’s got a conference in Lynwood this week that started today, so I’m currently alone. Waiting.

It’s been amazing. It’s been perfect. And I can’t wait to get back.

My mom called me yesterday to report on the kids (she’s raising them this weekend) and I was kind of shocked to find out that I’m noticably missed. Apparently, Rex keeps telling her, “Mommy will be back in fifteen minutes!” and “Mommy will be back in 45 minutes, Grandma!” And my smart  little June Bug? She woke up from her nap yesterday, let herself out and headed downstairs calling, “Annie! Annie!” I guess she figured that if “Mommy” didn’t work, she’d try the other one.

As moms, it’s easy to get so caught up in finding a moment of personal peace and quiet, a second to regroup and shake them off your apron strings, that we forget: we’re their world. For a brief moment in time, you are the center of their life. You are the most important opinion. You are the face that matters, the words that sooth, the kiss that heals.

When my mom told me those things about my children yesterday, it took everything in me to keep from saying, “To heck with the ferry, I’m swimming.” Right now, as magical and wonderful as my weekend with sweet Jason has been, we both want nothing more than a few stale chicken nuggets and midnight sippy cup runs. Two more hours and I’m outta here.

Babies, Mama’s coming.


Comments

  1. Mmmm. Sweet babies. The best is when they’re teenagers and say those same kinds of things (except when they call you by your name, it’s not quite as cute).

  2. i love it, so sweet!

  3. I always love your posts. You are the kind of mom I want to be.

  4. That was very sweet. Thank you. I needed that today.

  5. It’s my favorite part of going away, even for just a few hours. Coming home and knowing they missed you and have lots to talk about with hugs and kisses.

  6. I love this post. I forget that I mean that much to my kids. I think so many mommies do. I’m so happy for you to rush home to them. =]

  7. Every time I leave my kids I’m shocked by how much I miss them. I loved this post…such great perspective in that this time of life only lasts a bit, and I should enjoy it while I can.

  8. You’re making me a little bit ill here. I think I need to get away from my kids.

  9. How sweet, now tell the truth, how long until you wished you were back on that island? Was it the idealic homecoming you pictured? What always happens to me the second I get home the compliant department opens, whining and beating on each other commences and my mother will wonder aloud,”They were such angels, I’m not sure what happened.” Me neither.

  10. My MIL had my kids the other day and after hours of sitting around relaxing and watching tv that wasn’t animated I found myself looking around the house…bored, lonely, and wondering when my little munchkins were coming home.

    Oh they came alright! I took them into my arms and smothered them with kisses. And after .2 seconds were fighting with one another and I was looking for a place to hide.

    Love the post, so true, yet so quickly they can have you running for any room in the house that has a lock.

  11. I promise…..before you know it they are grown! I didn’t believe it until it happened to me. My baby turns 18 tomorrow. You can’t recapture those moments again!

  12. I have a splendid idea. Next time you and your husband plan a vacation (which should be soon, RIGHT? Tomorrow? NOW?!!!) you can just send the tickets to me. So that way your kids won’t miss you. Oh, and also, you’re babysitting mine. I LOVE this arrangement!!!!

  13. Just found your blog via my google reader recommendations. I read and enjoyed many of your posts. I am so happy to have found another blog where good writing is key. Thanks for sharing your words with us.

  14. This just sums up life as a mother doesn’t! Sometimes we can’t live with them and others we can’t live without them. I adore my children most of the time but can’t wait for our yearly break together either. Returning home is usually bittersweet though, particularly the older they get. I really do miss having tiny ones, cherish this time it does go quicker than you think.

  15. Reading this post almost makes me feel guilty that I am leaving them in with my mom in 47 days to go on our 10-year anniversary 2nd honeymoon. (I’ve never left my almost 2 year old- ever!)

    Almost.

  16. I spent a week away from my kids to go to girls camp as the camp director. It was nice to come home and get smothered in hugs and kisses 🙂