Insight from Dr. Seuss

Last night I tried to feed my three-year-old broccoli. Our conversation went something like this.

I be Mom. Mom I be. Do you like green broccoli?

I do not like it, Mom I Be, I do not like green broccoli.

Would you like it on the table? Would you eat it for Aunt Mable?

Not on the table, not with Aunt Mable! I do not like green broccoli, I do not like it, Mom I Be.

Would you, could you from the floor? Eat them! Eat them! I implore!

I would not could not from the floor.

You may like them, ornery brat. Eat them or I’ll get the bat. 

I could not, would not, Mom I Be. I want ice cream! Let me be!

A fork a fork a fork a fork! Would you eat them from a fork?

I would not could not from a fork. 

Would you eat them with some pork?

Not with a fork, not with some pork! I do not like green broccoli. I will not eat it, Mom I be.

Say! In the dark, here in the dark! Would you, could you in the dark?

(banging on closet door) I would not could not in the dark!

Would you, could you in the rain?

(banging on the door to come back inside) I would not could not in the rain! Not in the dark, Mom you’re insane!

Could you, would you with your brother?

I could not, would not with my brother.

Would you, could you for your mother?

I would not, could not for my mother. I will not, will not with my brother. I do not like them here or there, I do not like them ANYWHERE. I do not like green broccoli, I do not like them, Mom I Be.

You do not like them, this I hear. Fine. We’ll try again next year.

(And NO ice cream.)


  1. Very impressive! You may be able to tell from my blog, but I kind of love Dr. Seuss-so I also kind of loved that post:)

    Also–does he really have an aunt named Mable?…

  2. ha ha. Very clever. I can tell what stage you’re in.

    Hold firm on that no ice cream! Or maybe he’ll eat it WITH the ice cream. Did you try that?

  3. Put it in his meatloaf. You can feed them anything in meatloaf.

  4. Too funny!

  5. For some reason my kids love “little trees”. It’s always nice to have the no ice cream back up plan. Good luck with the “little trees”!

  6. annie valentine says:

    We’ve tried Little Trees. No go. He’s more of a carnivore.

  7. I don’t know if anyone else noticed this but… your entire conversation with your three year old son RHYMED!
    That’s pretty impressive.

  8. That was cool! Now do Shel Silverstien!

    Sometimes we can bribe our 5 year old into eating 1 WHOLE BITE of broccoli (or cauliflower, or carrots, or peas, or green beans, or anything remotely healthy) before dessert. But our 3 year old – no go. I don’t think that kid has eaten a vegetable in like….3 years. But then again he hasn’t had dessert either.

  9. Nice play on Dr. Seuss that is how it is at our house also…only I always cave with the Ice cream! 🙂

  10. Your son is crazy, mom I be . Oh how I love green broccoli.

    (Ice cream is pretty good too.)

  11. Okay, you have to check out these SUPERFUN books by Saxton Freymann and Joost Elffers. They have titles like “Don’t Play with your food”, “Baby Food”, “Dog Food” and so forth and so on. The whole book is actually photographs of silly-shaped food that has been turned into art. It has COMPLETELY changed my 3yr.old’s perception of eating her veggies! Check ’em out!

  12. Sorry, I’m on his side. I hate broccoli too. But awesome story!