I like it black

I love the new Mazda 5.

Honestly, it’s like driving a toy minivan around. It gets good gas mileage, my children think the new Zoom Zoom car is fast and cool, and I feel like I’m driving a metro with a secret compartment for kids, it’s so easy to maneuver.

However, nothing is perfect and there are three things I do not love about this vehicle. The first two I’m stuck with. I really wanted Blue Tooth, and there isn’t much storage space in the back.

I’ve been psyching myself up for the storage space bit, giving myself internal lectures on simplicity and less-crap-living in general. Nothing like a small car to eliminate extra baggage, right?

For the record, most states don’t actually consider children baggage, so I’m out there. Enter complexity and crap.

But the third thing I hated about the car was the lack of tinted windows. Any woman who’s ever driven down the road with a tired baby in the backseat sitting in full sun knows just how miserable it can be.

Also, I would like to be able to run into the post office without anyone snooping in my windows at all the underage cargo strapped in the backseats.*

“Honey,” I said to Jason after the first week with our car, “I have to have tinted windows. Now.”

“As you wish,” he wisely replied.

When we pulled up to the auto body shop the next afternoon, Jason started to head inside.

“I want it as dark as it can possibly be,” I said. “You know, to keep the car cool and stuff.” Stuff like running into the cleaners.

Five minutes later he came out. “They said they could do the windows at a level five.”

“A five? Is that dark enough?” I asked. “Five doesn’t sound very high to me, I want a ten.”

“Sorry babe, he said five was as dark as they could go.”

I sighed and decided to be content. Anything was better than zero.

The next afternoon we picked up the car for the last time. We drove in and immediately got a look at our new pimped out vehicle.

I say pimped out because I was quite sure a gangster was going to open fire on me any second.

It looked like they had taken a can of black spray paint and fogged out all the windows. I approached it slowly and once I got close, put my hands around my eyes and tried to peer in.

I couldn’t see a darn thing.

All I can say is Hello Harrison! Welcome to the wonderful world of vehicular babysitting!

We drove that little baby up to the port in Tacoma that afternoon, said goodbye, and watched the first little piece of our life ship off to Germany.

Holy reality check we’re really moving.

 

*In the real, non-blog world, mother’s should never, ever leave small children unattended in the car while they run errands, go to the spa, or participate in illicit affairs. In the blog world we sometimes joke about things good mothers would never really do.

 

 


Comments

  1. Camille says:

    I’m glad you like your new mini mini van. I sure love mine with my dark tinted windows. Your teeny van will fit in perfectly in Germany

  2. I hope you’re really going to see me before you go!

  3. I really hope you are joking about leaving your kids in the car, because that is very unsafe. It’s really not a funny joke.

  4. Hrmm…I wonder how much darker I can get my windows? 😉
    (and I wonder how many strongly-worded emails you’re going to get about this one! hahahaha!)

  5. I have four kids. I totally get what you’re saying–like when I have to run into the library to get the books that are right there waiting for me, its so not worth it hauling in all four kids who are very loud and want to look at all the books when I can be in and out in less than two minutes. Like so not worth it that I would go to jail over it. 😉

  6. Mary Richards says:

    You are so funny! I swear just about every post makes me giggle. Best of luck with the packing and the move!