The ship has landed…on its head

We. Are. Here.

I know, it doesn’t seem real to me either. Perhaps that’s because we spent our first 48 hours of Germany confined to a three block radius on base, surrounded by super American Americans.

The flights over were, in some ways, too easy. There were moments when I could practically feel the chariots of angels escorting us, keeping the kids safe and meltdown free. The glitches were few but potent. Most of them involved me.

For example, after a full day of traveling from Salt Lake to Baltimore, they finally started boarding the Rotator (aka Patriot Express) just before ten pm. In order to avoid multiple trips to the loo, I decided to run to the restroom thirty seconds before taking the plunge. Unfortunately, I ran into everyone’s least favorite Aunt in the bathroom. Talk about unprepared, it’s been two solid years since she and I have been in touch.

With over a hundred soldiers all watching and waiting for me and the circus to get on with the pre-boarding already, I had to make quick friends with one of the small handful of other mom’s on the flight.

Did I mention that the plane was full of men? Have you ever tried to casually ask a total stranger for a tampon with an audience of 194 curious boys standing seven inches away? Could anything be more my life than that right there?

The good news is that within ten minutes of boarding all four of my dumplings were zonked out like a bunch of little snorty pugs. It was a good thing. With a plane filled with soldiers heading out into the field of battle, we ended up sitting right there at the gate for over four hours because two of the idiots on board decided to get sloshed just prior to take off. They were both so drunk and so sick that the captain finally kicked them off.

It took the ground crew an hour and a half to locate all 14 of their bags, then another hour and a half to re-ticket and reboard the airplane. The captain was kind enough to let my babies stay aboard during all the chaos (also I might have threatened him with super death by mother bear if anyone even attempted to dislodge them). The kids all slept a full 8 hours of that 12 hour ordeal, Georgia ten.

So here we are and I don’t know what to do with myself. Since I’ve only had seven hours of sleep in the past two days, I really should try to get some rest.

Good thing I brought the laundry to keep me company.


  1. Welcome to this side of the pond! I’m glad you guys made it safely and relatively unscathed! And you’re missing the Stateside heat waves – BONUS! Best of luck with the jetlag/hotel living – I hope some kind RS ladies gobble you up and get you out a little as the settling in begins! First weekend in Aug you can find great fireworks shows on the Rhine! All sorts of sommerfests going on . . . and if we ever get some summer weather, hit up a German pool – but not after 8 when some are “textile free.” 😉 I’m praying for great housing opening up fast for you!

  2. Those kids are getting more sleep than I am! I miss you already.

  3. I think this will be a wonderful experience for you. You will find that you will grow to love your new home. Just get involved, try to learn a little of the language and love the people. It is rather like a mission I think, you will love who you serve. I know that we have lived many places and made wonderful friends. The experience changed my life forever in a good way. I hope you love it all!!

  4. Are you kidding me?! I started my period this last weekend too and its been two years for me as well. It was terrible. Can they just take my whole uterus out because I don’t want another period ever again. And you had to do it while moving your whole family to Germany. Sheesh. Well, I hope everyone’s adjusting well, really best luck to you all!

  5. Here’s to wishing you a wonderful nap with your head aloft a pile of laundry (clean or dirty – it doesn’t matter. Naps first!) And just so you know, I’m working on a prototype teleporting device (don’t tell your husband because I’m keeping it a secret from the government since I know they’ll lock me away and probe my brain if they knew I was capable of creating a working teleporter). Once it’s finished, I’ll have Kristina round of your girls, and then we’ll all squish in it, and then suddenly show up in your newly remodeled kitchen where you can then take us to the best sausage restaurant in all of Germany. But right now all of my teleporting test subjects are turning out more like that guy in The Fly, so it needs a bit of work. (Also, all of my kids are buzzing around the ceiling, which is getting pretty annoying.)

  6. WOW! I’m impressed TWO years without “Aunt Flo”!!!! Totally amazing .. . . . . . . I’ve been without her for 2 years also but that was because of a certain operation beginning with an H.

    Glad your trip was safe and sound . . . . can’t wait to read your “Germany” posts!

  7. Hooray for Germany! What part are you in again? My sister is stationed in Vilseck till next autumn/winter-ish.

  8. I am so excited for your family. You are going to have such a wonderful adventure! Glad to hear that you arrived safely, with the exception of Aunt Flo. Darn her and her ability to always show up at the wrong time.

  9. I’m glad you made it so I could meet you at the church shin-dig. Thanks for chatting with me. I look forward to running into you again and reading about your experiences here in Germany. By the way, I meant to tell you that your hair is cute. 🙂

  10. I am so glad you are there safe and sound. And angels love escorting people around to their destinations. We have felt them too. Warm wishes.

  11. Oh, Annie, you do EVERYTHING in style.

  12. glad you’re safe & sound. and i’m thinking we’ve all been a little insensitive here. what about looking at it from the perspective of the laundry. i bet, more importantly, its glad you were nearby, cause perhaps this is as traumatizing, if not more so, for the laundry. without you, it would be lost! 😉 (hope you’re smiling. ::hugs::)

  13. I kept thinking, “Who is the least favorite Aunt? Who?” Totally did not get it. I am tired. But probably not as much as you. 🙂