Leaving on a Jet Plane? No problem.

I feel bad for couples who are never apart.

Here’s the thing, before Jason ditched me for his four and a half month training last year, the longest we’d ever been apart was just a few days. Even then, it had only happened a handful of times.

But since that time, he’s had to fly yonder for work related week long jaunts on a semi-regular basis. Plus, the kids and I did another summer training program up in Washington this year (it’s called, Memorize the Names and Faces of All 152 Valentine Cousins and How They’re Related To You in Four Weeks or Less), thus leaving Daddy high and dry for nearly three weeks.


I’m dead serious. You wouldn’t believe what a little time away does for your self-esteem. All those things he never notices at home? The clean underwear, the homemade meals crafted with oh so much love, tenderness and MSG, that new lipstick…suddenly, they’re all he wants to talk about. It’s kind of the best self-esteem boost in the world.

And the best part is, the longer you’re apart, the longer these Mad About You symptoms last. It’s like going on a marriage diet. The diet part bites, but the results are fabuloso. Absence makes the heart beat twice as fast, the pulse race like a teenage boy, and the gratitude tribute worthy of a saint.

We’ve been back together for a week now, and even so, he still seems to think I’m all tens. That’s really saying something, considering the fact that he came home from work yesterday to find the fridge empty, the house covered in half-unpacked suitcases, and four weeks of mail sloshed across every available work surface. And still…

He leaves tonight for a weekend bike trip with the scouts. Man, I’m going to look sooo good after 24 hours with those stinky kids.


  1. I hadn’t really ever thought this through but now I think I need to.

    Or maybe it’s better if I don’t.

  2. My husband is gone a lot. I need to step up my game, apparently!

  3. I totally agree!

    (me thinks its time for a getaway so he can remember how awesome i am!)

  4. annie valentine says:

    See Kristina, it’s really best when YOU leave. I try to ditch him at least twice a year.

  5. I experienced this when I went away for four days this past Spring. Coming home was seriously SWEET. And there have been lingering effects ever since. Time to plot my next escape/romance booster methinks…

  6. This is almost all-the-way true except that they “cave” the whole time you’re gone, and kind of forget how to communicate. The can drool and grope and stuff, but it takes a while for them to “resocialize.” 🙂

  7. While I was at Girls Camp and then Youth Conference the same thing happened with my husband…except instead of doting and complimentary, he went to groping and handsy. Its so lovely. 🙁

  8. The last 2 months Bryce has been away an average of 3 days a week. I am getting nothing of the sort. You are a lucky duck. Maybe it’s that I am almost 9 months pregnant, snore, fat, and completely unappealing in every way. Can this have something to do with it? Or do I just have a lame-o husband right now?

    What ever-GO JASON!

  9. I agree with you, absence makes the heart grow fonder! There are times that I cannot wait for him to go on a week long field operation, even a month long, get him out of my hair kind of thing. Right when you really start missing them, there they are! Everthing is just much more appreciated about each other. Absence is great for relationships that are solid, being an army wife, i know to well the drama associated with seperations!
    Oh a year is just to long 🙁
    A month down, 11 to go!

  10. For the first time in all of our 13 years of marraige we no longer have a part time relationship. My husband has always worked away at least some of the week, and for nearly 2 years Monday to Friday. Now he has a local job so never gets to miss me. Maybe I should go away now? Actually I was thinking hard about it, but am not sure what devestation I would come back to in the house. Love and adoration is a good thing, all husbands should have lessons in it I think in priesthood time.

  11. Ya know, we are in our 30’s and already thinking that retirement isn’t going to suit us very well. I mean, together ALL the time? When will we get a chance to miss each other?

  12. I’m glad you had a great trip, and a very loving husband waiting for you!!

  13. I have had the pleasure of this experience….although, whilst we were in the experience it was horrible! Being separated for months on end was hellacious! But the coming together was like the first touch…..it was awesome!

  14. That’s so funny! I say this all the time to my friends and they always say that they think a good relationship doesn’t need time apart… but I it works for us! They do appreciate you more don’t they! lol!

  15. So so true. It’s hard to be away from the spouse but it’s amazing how much it does for our relationship. It seems we both work extra hard while we’re apart and then when we’re back togtether everything is rosy-er and brighter. Great post!

  16. Ah, you’re wise. I never thought about it like that before.