I AM A COLUMNIST!
That’s right, you are now reading the words of a soon to be well-known weekly newspaper columnist. Well-known is a relative term here. I don’t actually mean hordes of readers are going to flock to the The Vidette simply to read my stuff, I mean that the few people who actually read it will get to know me really well.
I actually do have some credentials here, a journalism degree isn’t easy to come by. Oh who am I kidding. I went with Journalism because instead of those English Majors who had to write 16 page papers, we only had to write 16 inches. It was VERY EASY to come by. I just never thought I’d actually use it.
But here I am, using using using. Throwing that diploma and my short list of published articles in every editor’s face in hopes that he or she (as it turned out to be) would just publish me already.
Let me tell you, this has been a long hard process. I don’t care how big or small a paper is, editors get dozens of queries a week from hopeful columnists. Anyone who’s ever freelanced or tried to get published knows that as my friend Brandon Mull (popular author of the Fablehaven series) once told me, this industry is designed to keep people out.
(Brandon Mull isn’t actually a personal friend, more like a personal friend of an acquaintance of mine that I got permission to email when I had writing questions and couldn’t find an answer anywhere else on the internet. He’s written back to me both times, however, so I feel that I can safely drop his name whenever humanly possible to make myself look cool.)
Anyway. I have been planning to take the newspaper industry by storm for the past nine months, and in fact only started blogging to see if I could actually write a column and if anyone would ever want to read it. So if you are reading this, YOU ROCK.
And if you live in Washington, specifically the Grays Harbor County area, more specifically East County (serving Montesano, Elma and McCleary), then please subscribe to The Vidette TODAY. No really, myself and My Editor would both wholeheartedly appreciate it. Oh my gosh. I HAVE AN EDITOR.
This is just the beginning. Soon, small weekly newspapers across the country will carry a humorous column about an often overdramatic blond girl and her three or four children and Poor Husband. I will be epidemic! Wait, that might be the wrong word, but it actually fits there so I’ll just go with it.
(PS – You’ll have to wait until after publication to get my weekly article. She’s not going to publish it on her website because then why would anyone buy her paper? See? I’m a MAJOR DRAW. I knew being Miss Grays Harbor 1997 would finally pay off.)
Yep, I knew you’d made it too, when the other day I saw your blog title next to Seriously So Blessed on the daily Mormon Mommy Blog listing. Pretty cool!
oh, when the time comes, will you please do a post about the JC Reunion? I’m sad I can’t be there. Sam’s Coast Guard Academy 10 year reunion took precedence. Go figure.
I have a friend who lives in Montesano, and she is already a paying customer of the newspaper, so I told her to look for your column. Congrats, I know we have enjoyed your daily little tid bits, as I have titled your blog, ‘the funniest lady I don’t know’!!
I can’t wait to read your first column. . .who knows, maybe I’ll subscribe to the paper, even though I live in Oregon. . . I’m so proud of you, CONGRATS!!! Sarah
This doesn’t mean you are going to quit blogging does it? I HOPE NOT!
I’ve already offered my congrats just about everywhere else but you’ll get it here too.
YOU ARE A ROCKSTAR!!!
I think your first column should be all about you. Oh, I know! I was going to say you could use the lovely little blip I posted (mistakenly) on your profile – you know, the Lame-o Annie one? But on second thought, the lovely piece you recently placed on my sidebar about how incredibly cool I think I am (I believe there was something about being “so cool my pants froze to my legs one time”) would be a perfect intro for all your new readers. After all, this proves that you really are “So Cool”. And we’re talking “pants-freezing-to-the-legs” kind of cool.
Can I touch you?
Congrats!!!
How awesome!! Do you think you’ll have anything to say? Just kidding. You’re a natural. I didn’t even know that’s what your degree was in.
Jessie, you didn’t know that was my degree? YOU WERE MY COLLEGE ROOMMATE.
It’s about time. I have been stalking you for months, and now I don’t have to keep myself quiet. You’re a hysterically funny woman, with real talent. I’m glad you’ve found a place to share it. Plan to be famous. Tell that hubby of yours to plan on it, too. If he’s good, you’ll let him be on your personal security detail when Palin makes you the VP choice in 4 years.
CONGRATULATIONS! I don’t even know you and I haven’t even read you, but I know exactly how you feel and I want to give you a virtual high five! You go, girl!
Annie, that is so exciting, hey first step-The Vidette, second step-Carrie Bradshaw, only nicer…no I don’t (always) watch Sex in the City (on TBS), but you know what I mean-your column in some big NEW YORK PAPER!!!
It's about blinkin' time lady! I thought your self adulation was bad, just wait til you're actually published in black & white – it will be unreal after that! Don't even THINK that you're going to justify a new wardrobe into this deal. See? I know how you think.
Really – couldn't be prouder of you Annie. Do you get some kind of raise/bonus if the subscription numbers skyrocket and we start writing fan mail to the editor? Just a thought.
Congrats!!
Oh!! Congratulations!! I keep trying to read your Friend article and then get sidetracked. If I lived nearby I would totally buy and read that paper!! So you can consider me a supporter from afar!
I’m jealous. You get paid to have people hang on your every word… what woman wouldn’t be in hog heaven??
Congrats. That’s awesome!
Thanks so much everyone. I’d just like to thank the Blogademy for their continued support and witty commentary. *Sniff*
And Tanya, of course I need a new wardrobe. I shouldn’t be writing all these expensive professional words in my bathrobe, should I? At least a few new track suits, maybe a ball gown…
Something I wrote was once published… in my blog. So I know exactly how you feel.
Congratulations Annie! I am so proud of you!
Congratulations! I have always thought you were a great writer 🙂 And I don’t know, but I think I vote with you…go for the new wardrobe, I’m always in favor of anything that gets me new clothes or shoes, especially shoes…Sorry Tanya!
congrats annie! I’m very proud of you! You are going to make tons of people laugh! Now you just need to write a book on how to raise kids!
A book, eh? I could call it, How To Raise Kids Without Ever Feeding Them Vegetables. Actually, that’s not too bad…
Yahoo so does that mean you wont still humor us on your blog? I really enjoy your blog. I am so excited for you.
So glad for you! Maybe with your millions you’ll earn as a famous writer, you can hire someone to do LAUNDRY!
At least, that’s what I’d do with my millions. (bet you can guess what’s overtaken my basement, eh?)
xoxo
Congratulations! I’m not surprised though, it seems you are fit for the description! I’ll be sure and check out your column online if it’s available! Maybe you’ll have to create a link to your article!
I just want to add my congratulations here! I wish you success.