recap: Rex and German school in a nutshell and what we’re doing about it

This one is for the paper. I thought it was worth summing up and printing.

“Last week Rex (6) came home from school and quietly informed me that the kids in his German school are hurting him.

As a mother, I like to think I’ve got the power to protect him from the world. Why can’t my love be strong enough to shield him from all the bad things, like mean kids and painful experiences? Sometimes I wish I could love him right into a bubble and keep him safe.

This was the first time in his three weeks of German school that I had heard anything negative from Rex. He comes home every day happy, never cries about going to school, does his homework assignments with enthusiasm–no signs of trouble. Plus, the few notes I’ve received from his teacher have all been positive.

The next day I went in for a visit. It turns out things are not going smoothly for Rex. The kids won’t play with him, he has trouble paying attention to his teacher so he isn’t learning the language (she only speaks German which is also one of the reasons he has trouble paying attention). Everyone was frustrated. All in all, the situation is about as fragile as glue soaked tissue paper.

In America, I would have received some kind of note or a request for outside assistance. In Germany, they seem more inclined to keep home things at home and school things at school.

Because three weeks isn’t long enough to warrant giving this a good try, and because we don’t want our son to grow up thinking that we run away from difficult situations, Dad and I both feel that we need to stay in the ring and help him work through this. Anything worthwhile is worth fighting for, even when you’re six.

So I presented his teacher with a plan that is nothing short of genius: a sticker chart. Apparently in Germany parents don’t usually approach the teachers with fantastical ideas like working together so she was quite enthusiastic about the whole scheme.

In addition to his behavior chart, I told her that if she can give me lists of words and phrases, I will teach him German.

I’ve been so adamant about the kids not watching television this past month, but I’m suddenly realizing that Rex should be spending every spare second in front of German cartoons. He is now on a strict diet of six movies a day with a short break for dinner.

My kids think they’ve died and gone to German heaven.

We have been here for six weeks and up to this point, every time I think about trying to get a toe hold on the language I feel overwhelmed and panicky. It’s fast, it’s furious, and don’t believe anyone who says “it sounds like English” because they haven’t tried to shop for motzarella cheese at the local market.

But the moment my boy’s welfare and happiness entered the equation something changed in my head. Don’t ask me how but I am like a German sponge. For the past week, every single word I learn I remember. Phrases are rolling off my tongue and my little handheld translation tool is my new best friend.

I am a mother, and if learning German to help my child succeed is what I need to do, then stand back and watch me go. There is no motivation in this world that can even touch this kind of love. He is my child, and if I have to sit and watch German soap operas for the next year then so help me, I will.”